It's coming to an end , another great year , another storybook to be closed. Then there's the typical "New Years Resolution and 1/365" thing that will definitely pop up on all social media , not that I'm complaining or anything ~ I do spam the same stuff on my Facebook, and Twitter if I even bother to check it.

This year marked one year since I joined university , and it's been tremendously entertaining and somewhat joyful. Of course, the assignments that were given to me over the course of the four semesters (I believe) have been extremely hard and stressful. But here I am, surviving ~ not fully because I did drop a few subjects to make it through, and retook some as well.

Plenty of students arrived this year , and it certainly was fun to announce "I'm your senior" to a lot of them, because heck ~ I'll annoy everyone as much as I can, while I can. I'll be doing my degree course locally anyways, so I'll be around. All the newcomers were really friendly, which is a great start, then there's the getting to know each other part, which was somewhat tough, but with patience, and some Instagram stalking, I figured out everyone's names.

Prom. That one night in your life when everyone's dressed to the nines and then there's me, trying to not get choked by my necktie. Never again, shall I be wearing any form of ties, no matter how good I (might) look wearing them. Throwback to 2014, when prom was actually a thing that was being organized, but us Form 5's did not have the proper fundings to actually hold a prom in a fancy ballroom, so the idea was scraped. I was going to be attending the function without a partner anyways.

But hey, university's different - and I went with a boy date and a girl date, because why not. It was supposed to be a double date kind of thing, but my poor mate got rejected by the girl he tried to ask to prom, so he latched on to me for the rest of the night. No complains though, he's a good wingman. Maybe even the best. Too far, too far. Ted is the best wingman.


My laptop broke down this year, which meant goodbye to my main laptop , which was my (old) Lenovo. Laptop's aren't cheap, and since I just purchased a MacBook for college work , and possibly for literal work in the future ~ since that's all an Apple laptop is capable of, my chances of getting my main laptop replaced was slim. As much as it's cool to own an Apple laptop, that thing doesn't allow me to play video games (probably for the best) , and it's hard to navigate my way around the interface and what not ~ I'm still struggling till this day.

But my dad agreed to purchase a new Windows operated laptop for me, and I got my hands on not just a brand new Windows laptop, but a gaming series laptop - MSI. It's an amazing addition to my tech "collection" of some sort , and of course ~ the laptop can do way more things than my former Lenovo could, so I'm really grateful for that.

My phone's carrier contract was to expire this year , and I was allowed to either stick to the current phone (Samsung Galaxy Note 4) , or upgrade to the latest generation. My phone was acting out as the contract deadline was approaching, so it was quite logical to get a new phone along with a contract extension for my phone carrier. I was planning on just stepping up the tech tree to the Note 7 , but we all know what happened with that phone.

The next big thing was the iPhone 7 and 7 Plus, which was extremely cool but very controversial , with the removal of the headphone jack as to cater for a "wireless future" as Apple quotes. The AirPods is honestly a joke, but at least there are lightning earphones and the small lightning to headphone jack extension that comes along in the box when you purchase the phone. I did a lot of research, contemplating and brain storming till I just decided to step up from Android to Apple. I've not regretted the choice, as the phone is absolutely amazing.

My grandma offered to pay off the bill for the phone as my Christmas present, so it's safe to say that I've had a crazy Christmas this year. The color was one thing that I had trouble deciding on, but I went ahead with the Matte Black , 256 GB iPhone 7 Plus ~ as most people did too. The Jet Black version looks amazing , but it's a fingerprint and scratch magnet, so no thank you.

So in short, both my laptop and phone died in the same year, and I managed to get a huge upgrade in terms of tech and basically the specifications of both the laptop and phone individually. I'm grateful for all the things I've gotten thus far, I'm done with complaining.

• Laptop specs

There are 7 billion people on the planet as of right now. Millions of races, religions, ethics, personalities, backgrounds, beliefs, and the list goes on. The phrase "there are many fish in the sea" means that if you fail being in your relationship, there's always a second try, and a third try, and a fourth try.....until you find the one and finally decide to marry one another in man and wife, man and man or wife and wife. I'm not one to judge, and I fully support the LGBT community.

I was brought up in a strict childhood, having almost no freedom whatsoever, and I couldn't even just watch a movie with my friends. Of course, times have changed and I do have my share of freedom now. I've been an introvert my entire life, and although it may seem like a bad thing to be to some, it really isn't all negatives, as there are positives to that end as well.

I didn't bond well with everyone, and I was very selective of whom I made friends with. I still do, but I've widen my spectrum to allow more people into my life, because at the end of the day - we as humans can't really live in pure isolation. My first years were spent with two people, Justin and Chelsea. We practically did everything together, then I entered primary school. I was somehow very sociable with girls when I was really young, so I often hanged with the girl group, chatting about Barbie and whatnot. 

Eventually I made friends with boys, and gained lots of friends - some of whom I still keep in touch until today. They've been there for me in times of need, when I was down and when I was happy. They supported me to Hell and back, and I'm eternally grateful for these few individuals.

High school dawned on me, and it was the time to try and fit in with the cool kids, to gain fame and attract as much attention as possible, let it be by bullying the kids who were younger than you, or just looking good naturally, and the girls would come flocking your way. I had neither of those things, as I was still being completely reserved. The time came when I reached my adolescence period, where I started to gain feelings for girls - and attempting to contain those feelings.

Of course, words slipped out, people were blushing/ laughing and whatnot, but it didn't really bother me too much. Talking to girls was the hardest thing that I had to do in high school, as they were always freaky, bossy, and generally very hard to understand. I wasn't good looking anyways so I was ignored for the most part, which saved me the trouble to muster up the courage just to be two feet in front of her face just to say hello.

This habit continued until form 3, when I started to gain feelings yet again - for this girl in my tuition center. I've known her from church, and I had a clear picture of her likes and dislikes - as she comes from a really strong Christian family. It took a while, and a lot of self convincing - but I approached her and started talking. We exchanged phone numbers and everything in my body went into hyper drive. 

Her phone number alone was almost as if I was carrying nuclear launch codes, and whatever I chose to do with this piece of information, could and might change a lot of things in the future. I ended up calling her, and she was really nice. The issue was me confronting her face-to-face, just to tell her how I felt about her, as it felt like my courage fell into a haystack, and the needle was my guts. I resulted to one of the most embarrassing and awkward ways to confess to someone, by writing a letter. But here's the fun part, I didn't deliver the letter to her - I got a friend of mine to do the bidding for me.

The following day, I met up with my friend from school and he told me how she hated the letter and found me revolting. That's really the easiest way to shatter someone's heart in a matter of seconds flat. Once I arrived home, I gave her a call to ask her about the letter, and she said that she really liked it and found it extremely cute. I ended up assaulting my friend the following day when I bumped into him during recess. She and I ended up chatting very regularly, and was very close to going out on a date. However, our parents restricted us from ever going out to enjoy ourselves as that was the year when we had a major exam on our hands to get through. She passed it with flying colors while I was just short of two A's to a perfect record.

Long distance relationships didn't work then, so we ended our relationship just three months after getting together. To this day, I still deny that the relationship even happened, as the two of us were equally awkward in handling the relationship, not knowing how to commit to each other in a minor way. So in other terms, I've never been in a relationship - until now.

Fast forward four years later, and I'm in college - on my third semester and the brand new batch of students have just enrolled themselves in. Everything that happened from then onwards was a one in a billion. There came this girl, introducing herself to me and stating that she liked playing video games just as much as I did, although our interests in what genre of games differed in a big way. She prefers the simple type of games, where everything is all cute and chubby - such as Maple Story. I on the other hand prefer a more competitive type of game that's filled with action, such as Counter Strike. We still clicked due to our similarities in our taste in music, and we both love singing. 

She plays the piano, I'm still procrastinating on learning an instrument. I've bought a keyboard and a classical guitar in the past two years, and I've made no progress whatsoever in playing either one of the instruments. Of course, that goes into next year's resolution, which I often never fulfill. Slowly, I started gaining feelings for her - but it felt more of a crush than being a very serious issue that the two of us were to agree on. So I kept this thing as just being friends, which lead to us becoming close friends.

Everything seemed okay, until she got admitted to the hospital about two months back for dengue. Usually, dengue patients would be discharged within a week of being hospitalized, but her condition worsened and she stayed in the hospital for a month. I went to visit her, and my heart sank when I saw her condition. I squatted down, just trying to keep myself from breaking down at the sight of how serious her condition was - and I knew then that this wasn't just a friendship thing, I liked her.

She got discharged, and we continued talking everyday. Then I decided to just give into my feelings and let her know how I felt. It was very hard to do over the phone, and it became extremely awkward for the both of us. She didn't really believe me , so the subject changed instantly to something else, but I couldn't shake the feeling that I just confessed for the very first time without requiring the help of a friend.

Days went by, and weeks, then I paid her a visit. I had lunch with her and watched a movie together. At that moment, my feelings were all over the place, whether or not it would be awkward to just find some quiet time and talk to her (there were three other friends present) about what happened in the past few weeks. We kept talking by messaging each other constantly, which lead to our first outing to the movies. 

Every thought and worry that was in my mind faded away the moment she got into my car, and we conversed like normal friends. I've never been this comfortable talking to a girl, ever - and I really enjoyed our talk on our way to the mall. We had lunch together and went grocery shopping and all. I figured that this is actually a date, between me and her - but I was extremely awkward while she just went along with my awkwardness. After the movie, I drove her back home, and although the outing was extremely awkward for the both of us, we really enjoyed ourselves.

We had a few chats - and we went from being friends to boyfriend and girlfriend. It is silly to start dating during college, as your studies does really matter over everything else, but I couldn't stand the fact that if I never told her how I felt about her, that someone else would take her instead, and I would suffer in silence knowing that I never even tried. 

Yes, there are a lot of risks doing this - but I'd rather be an idiot for taking the risk than to be the coward who didn't take it at all. This is my first official relationship, and I intend on making it last for as long as I can. I've never done anything like this before, so I have a lot to learn, and she's helping me through this whole thing together. 

As for you, the reader - you might find this whole Blog post so far to be very mushy and totally confidential, where it should be between myself and her. This is a really special moment for me, so I prefer to type it down in a space where I can reflect on this post in the future, and also this serves as an update so my website isn't deemed inactive.

I've spent a lot of nights talking to her, and I love every moment of it. Hearing her voice, her chuckle, the awkward flirting that tends to go on and us just asking questions to get to understand each other a little better. This has certainly been a good year for me, in many ways - but this is definitely the highlight of the whole thing. I have a lot of flaws, but I'm willing to change if it were to make her happy, because her smile is beautiful.

I guess this is what they call love drunk.

So I'm back, this time without any interesting picture to add on the top of my Blog post because I couldn't find any good pictures to use so, there will be only text in this one. The words in this post are 90% filtered, because of personal reasons. Enjoy this rant.

EDIT : Found one

It's sad how I have to express my feelings on a website rather than talking in real life - because they're all too ignorant to begin with anyways.

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College has been fun. Tons of assignments, made new friends, I don't even know anymore. Either way, it's quite an interesting semester because I get to create an event - which is nice, if only the lecturer who's teaching me isn't so much of a fuss over things. Don't really care if she reads this ; you're really demanding. Of course, this is a professional thing so I'll keep it professional. Unless of course, she actually reads this and decides to have a 1-on-1 chat with me over my personal issues with her, which I have none.

Life has been fun. My friend recently got out of the hospital after a month of being hospitalized for having dengue (with complications), so that's something to celebrate about. I should visit her soon, before she visits me in college being all grumpy because I did promise her. Oops.

There's a huge spectrum of stuff in my life and they all do classify as very retarded. Kind of in a sense that either I'm really grumpy over something so minor, or really happy that someone just died and I kinda hate that person. I don't see a downside to the latter. It's pretty much the same - eating the same shit every single day at home, which is what drives me away (no pun intended) - so I usually eat out. Yes, the food is expensive - but it ain't the same shit.

Bringing up some issues, which might already have been clarified a while ago in whichever Blog post I wrote, but I'm just going to repeat it again, as some people just don't get it. I'm going to be 19, which is insanely depressing because it's pretty much a trigger warning from the universe saying "hey, this is going to be the final year that you can call yourself a teenager. Next year, you'll be known as an adult." Well, crap. Being 19 and NOT have your own room to yourself is another major problem - because you don't have privacy.

I practically live in the hall, so most of the time, I have to look at faces which absolutely disgust me 85% of the time - as I'm never in a good mood - so to Hell with you. Other times, I just want to blast my music as loud as I want, or swear whenever I lose a match in a video game - but no, I'm disturbing the peace. You need the volume of the radio in the car to be about 6 because anything above that is deemed too loud, when EVERYONE else can't even hear a damn thing from the device, and the speakers are located at the bottom of the door - and yet you can somehow hear me swear when your door is closed. Honestly, I just need my own room , you pricks. 

Blah blah , the maid took my room. Let her stay in your brother-in-laws house for all I care. To claim that I can get full privacy in the room when I'm technically sharing it with my grandma - doesn't give me privacy at all. Staying in the hall, only grants me about 25% of privacy. Yes, I'm left alone for most of the day, but it doesn't help the fact that the house phone keeps ringing every damn hour because those insignificant people living in the other block can't seem to do anything by themselves and require other people to do things for them. Fight me, please - I know you read my Blog posts.

Seriously though, why do you read my Blog post when all I do is slander you most of the time, out of pure rage and hatred? Then again, you don't have anything to do most of the time, don't you? Jeez, knowing that my family members read my stuff is really frustrating, because I have to filter out a lot of the insults from my drafts. Thanks for making life even harder for me...

I do have the option to move back to my moms, which I'll gladly do if shit gets out of hand. Go on, complain about how I'm an ungrateful person - carry on. Truth is, I just want to move out, and the best and pretty much only solution is when I start studying overseas, and I'll just kiss this pathetic little country goodbye.

To white knight someone who does absolutely nothing, other than watching movies everyday and talking about vehicles when he himself can't even make a U-turn, is a serious joke. This conversation has happened before, and I was told to just go along with it, because apparently I'm the only one with balls to say that the faggot needs to die. Honestly, I don't give a shit about anyone in this family. My aunt, uncle and my cousin are coming over for a month of holiday at the end of the year - but I'm not very psyched about their visit. Things turned bitter the last time they were here, so what's stopping things from going haywire yet again, and maybe even worse than last year.

I've been told to not dwell in the past, and just move on with life. But if my life is full of toxicity because the people surrounding me are either retards, or scumbags, there's really no moving on for me. Perhaps the problem is not in other people. but in myself. Yes, I've thought of everything. Quite possibly it's just me being bitter about everything because well, things are absolutely shit for me. 

I have serious issues with my college assignments. 80% of the time, I'm completely clueless about what the heck I'm supposed to be doing in order to finish off the darn thing , but I don't even know what I don't know. I could ask the elders to help me, like my dad - but I choose not to. He has helped me a few times, but the help just made me even more confused with whatever it is I was doing back them. 

I've also been making enemies on Facebook , just because I don't fit in with their norm. Harambe is just a gorilla - so stop praising and worshiping that dead animal like it's your God or something. I really pity you, if you call a weird ass like Filthy Frank as your savior. But carry on, live your life to the edge of a cliff, and please jump off. Memes are not funny - they're freaking retarded. If you're one of the billions who are just as retarded as the next guy to like memes and want to meme for a living, I hope you live a sad life. It's a huge giveaway that your life is seriously pathetic when all you post on social media is "I have crippling depression and I want to die. Please kill me now." Honestly, I'd be glad to do so - just so that you don't have to embarrass the new generation of humans any longer, which I might add is a pathetic generation.

Ranting is fun, I should keep this up. 

So the Olympics is happening right now, and it's a very big deal for everyone on Earth - except for your truly. Let's recap over this whole situation.

It's a good thing to support an athlete that's competing in the Olympics that's representing your country , because it's the right thing to do. I've supported the previous Olympics , to only be disappointed because Malaysia's own Lee Chong Wei couldn't secure the Gold for the country. The typical Malaysian would be satisfied that he managed to secure a medal , although it's not the Gold. But for me , it was a hard thing to go through because I did support Lee Chong Wei to all ends.

Which brings me to this years Olympics. I'm not interested , and I do not care about this years Olympics. Once again , Malaysian representatives are competing in the Olympics in order to win the Gold for this country. Well done for them , for all their hard work , effort and determination.

The mixed badminton finals happened , and it was a Malaysian duo against an Indonesian duo. The hall is where I sit and do my work , and I'm facing directly towards the TV - so I'm bound to see what's going on . I watched the final half of the match , and the Malaysian team lost.

So here's my analysis over the whole game. Note that I'm not a badminton genius or even a coach of a badminton league , but these are simple mistakes that even a kid could figure out. There was poor coordination and teamwork in the Malaysian team , and they were making mistakes all over the place - which could have been avoided if they just got on the same page for the entire match. Props to the girl , because she really did a good job in the match . The guy however , he just couldn't get his head in the game.

Perhaps he sprained his leg or something , because there were a lot of shots that could have been deflected really easily , and he didn't take them. In the end , they got the Silver placement , whilst the Indonesian team took home the Gold. Congratulations to them. 

After that match , I went ahead to post my criticism on Facebook , which got a lot of hate. I wasn't really surprised , because I was the only one that didn't post cliché updates such as " Well done, you did your best" , or " Nice try , there's always a next time " . I was straight forward with how I felt about the match , and I'm pretty sure that I'm not the only one that thought of the match in a negative way.

A few people started to comment on my post , and they were full of hatred towards me. This proves a few things. One , I'm not patriotic - which shouldn't be a big surprise right now , because I've been talking about my displeasures living in this stupid country for months. 

Two , Malaysians are people that are easily triggered over someone stating their own opinion. Honestly , I don't care about what everyone has to say , because it's my own rights to say what I want to say. If they don't like it , unfriend me. 

Three , Malaysians are pretty pathetic. You're unable to withstand one small post on the Internet , that you have to resort to blocking me. It's fine , I don't care. You're ugly , you're washed up , and you're a really boring person. I've seen your face in college , and I never intended to say hello to you - and I sure as heck don't intend to do so now. It just proves my point that you're a wretched human being . 

Yes , I'd love to leave Malaysia - and start my life over in a different country. A country where the people aren't so obviously retarded , isn't so egocentric , isn't so close-minded , isn't so religiously paranoid over small and simple matters , doesn't have a autistic loser as a leader , and is way more ambitious.

Nothing in this pathetic country fits me. My interests are in other countries. My passions are in other countries. And my will to succeed exponentially in my life all leads to other countries . You all can coop here in this failure of a system , while I'm out there living my life to the max , and savoring every single moment of it. You're all blind to even see the cold harsh truth of reality - there's nothing in this country that can sustain a good future for anyone. 

Everyone is leaving Malaysia to study and work in other countries , and quite a lot of them don't intend on coming back "home". Why ? Because this dump is not worth being called home. Say what you want about me and my negativity , I don't care. I'm entitled to my own opinion and by all means , I'm so damn going to state my own opinions whenever I want , wherever I want , however I want. 

Carry on , live your cliché lives studying and ending up working in an office for the rest of your life , while I'm out there savoring every last bit that planet Earth has to offer. Don't worry , even if my life resolutions don't work out as I intend them to - I won't return to this pathetic place. Good day .  

It has been a month over since I updated anything on this Blog of mine , which I legitimately forgot that I even have to begin with. I decided to take a long break off my website and to just let life go on , which is quite moderate so far. 

Another semester in college has come to an end , and there have been some good and some bad that came along with it. I didn't enjoy this semester , as I took up two subjects that I have the least of interests in - Public Relations and Advertising. Allow me to elaborate further in details.

I'm not someone that prefers theory over practical. I never did like theory , as it wasn't my forte to begin with , and both of these subjects are theory subjects. There was a third , Social & Business Communication - but I decided to drop that subject because well , I couldn't come to terms with trying to enjoy a third subject solely on theory. There wouldn't be any fun. Thankfully , I heard that there will be some practical subjects to choose from for the next semester , so that would be really fun.

I've created new bonds , broken old ones , and changed the landscape of my surroundings in a drastic way. Of course , all this happened without me even realizing it , but it did happen - for better or for worse. Feeling affectionate over a particular girl has also occurred over this past month and a half . If you're reading this , I think you know who I'm referring to. I'll probably just stay a friend , considering that I'm ugly and no one really likes me.

Just kidding , I may be ugly - but I won't let that bring my morale down .

My braces life is reaching the one year mark , which means that I only have another year to go. It's not a period of suffering and pain , but it's extremely hard to eat food without having bits and pieces getting stuck between the wires every now and then. To add on , I'm not someone who would bring a dental kit around with me in my pocket or anything for on-the-go dental assistance. I felt really uncomfortable brushing my teeth the last time I brushed my teeth in a public toilet. It's gross and unhygienic , and I hope to never have to do that ever again.

But now I'm going to step into sensitive territory. In other words , religion will be the main topic for this Blog post.

In my life , I've been missing out on church for a lot of weeks in a row as of right now , and my mum isn't proud of it. Is it really compulsory to attend church just because you're a Christian. I believe that everyone has their own rights to say yes and no , which is clearly a privilege that I do not own as of right now. You can't force someone to do something against their own will. If I don't feel - sanctified while being in church , then the atmosphere isn't for me. Should I move to a new church , and probably somewhere that has more teenagers as compared to the one I'm currently in ? ... perhaps. 

I've hit rock bottom with this whole religion thing a while back , ever since religion was abused when literally any topic would be brought up. And before I proceed further , I have no intentions of targeting everyone in this religious belief , just a couple of serious believers that know nothing else but religion itself. 

I'll start off with Christianity. Yes , I'm going to target my own religion , and for a valid reason . Many lives have been lost over the past two months , with mass murders to terrorist attacks , and a serious jealousy problem turned ugly. That is what I'm looking to focus on for this section.

Unless you're living under a rock , you've heard of the Pulse Nightclub shooting in Orlando last year. 49 people were murdered in cold blood , and 53 others were wounded in the process. It was a gruesome moment in human history , and absolute carnage and sheer proof that humanity is falling into an abyss that we cannot climb up from. We either attempt to keep climbing out of the abyss , or give into despair and fall right in. 

The tragedy , is that this Californian pastor hasn't died by being shot 49 times - in the head . That would be utterly satisfying to watch. I'd be cheering for that. Yes , I'm with the LGBT community , I support them and I strongly believe that they deserve equal rights as all of us straight people. They're human beings too in case you were too blind to notice. There are also Tweets that states about how Jesus sent the shooter to kill them because they were gay . Well if God is really that cold hearted , then Christianity isn't the thing I'd like to believe in. Say what you want , judge how you like - I'm entitled to my own open opinions over everything . If being a Christian means that I should celebrate the killing of other people because they don't have sexual interests in the opposite gender , then I'd gladly say goodbye to my faith , which is already shaken as of this moment.

The shooter was a Muslim , which adds up to the reason why Donald Trump would win the presidential elections this year. Ban all the Muslims from America , or whatever his plan is , it isn't my problem as I live all the way on the other side of the world . It wouldn't affect me much , and there's no way in my life that I would even consider joining Islam , so I'm pretty sure he'll allow me to cross the border into USA. 

" Not all Muslims are terrorists , but all terrorists are Muslim " .

Let me repeat myself once again , I'm in no means disrespecting any religion here - but if you feel offended or something , feel free to contact me and share out your own opinion on my Twitter mentions. 

This leads me to my next subject , Muslims. There have been many incidents since the Pulse Nightclub , but I haven't really followed up on recent news so I'm not aware of the full situation on things that happened in Turkey , Nice and many other places. Am I stating that Muslims did those ? No , I'm not. But let me get to the main point.

Pokemon Go was released a month ago , and it has been the biggest craze / hit ever since then. People have been going on a rampage all over the world , attempting to catch them all and looking to become the best Pokemon trainer of all time. The craze was expected , considering that most , if not all of the players that were anxiously waiting for the game to be released , grew up watching Pokemon and playing the old classic card game.

What do Muslims have to do with Pokemon Go ? Well , I'm not a huge Pokemon fan to begin with , but I sure do want to play Pokemon Go. It gives me a really valid reason to get out of the house and walk all over searching for Pokemon , which means that I would get a lot of exercise - which is good for everyones health. In the meantime , you get to play a pretty sweet video game while doing so - which is a win-win situation. 

But some Muslims in Malaysia (and outside of Malaysia) think otherwise. These are the people that stain this country , turning it into one of the most self centered and autistic countries in the world , in the state of the management system alone. I don't really have to cover up on the 1MDB issue or anything , as it's all over the news these days.

Now let me just cut you off there , you utter disappointment of a human being . You admitted to know little to nothing about the video game , and you're just going to head straight to the conclusion that it condones gambling among Muslims . Oh please , have some valid context before even stating anything from here on . 

Yes , the game can become addictive , but if you're someone who knows their own limitations , you wouldn't cross the boundaries on when it comes to a video game. Yes maybe Mew Two spawned inside the meeting room , but if you're responsible - you wouldn't barge in with your smartphone in your hand , swiping at the screen...hoping to catch that Pokemon. What am I even saying ? It's Mew Two. I could find another job , I want that Pokemon !! *cough*

I also stumbled upon another interesting post while researching for my content above , containing the same autistic critter , about cinemas being illegal and stuff. 

http://www.themalaymailonline.com/malaysia/article/perak-mufti-wants-end-to-cinemas-claims-muslims-only-go-to-beromen

I could go on writing for hours , only for you all to read it within a few minutes , so I'll skip it short and just add one final pointer, and that is this handsome Devil. And yes , I mean that in a really sarcastic term , as this human piece of trash looks ugly as hell.

Same thing works for Symmetra. It's an entertainment and she's a character in a video game. If the Goddess skin is too revealing or something for that particular person to handle for his own sake , then what does he have to say about this ?

So I've been busy lately , living a life where I am feeling more insecure than I used to be. Severe depression , as my mum called it while we were talking on the phone last night , and she's not entirely wrong about that. 

Life could be a roller coaster , or it could be a really bad highway full of traffic lights , stop signs and cops pulling you over every now and then for identification and possibly to check if you're DUI . The point is that things don't go smoothly all the time , and sometimes it never does. You either endure it all by yourself , seek help from everyone you know , or just end your life . Those are the only three options , and I've attempted the third one , while I'm currently fighting on enduring the first. 

What about the second ? Well , here's the little fairytale about the second option. I've learned to cope on my own , at least for a starting point. Seeking help from my family members for the small delusions and nightmares my existential mind goes through day by day would be pointless , as they're too feeble minded to understand my thoughts. Believe me , I've tried talking to them about it once and they really just couldn't be bothered . See how retarded a family can be ?

We're growing up really fast . At least I am though. There are some days where I'd just imagine being able to travel back through time to those times where I was a naive little boy that expected life to be a smooth sailing ride . Oh how wrong I was back then.

I'm currently jugging on the facts where I would give it all up to start over , somewhere far away where I could live my dreams . Because at the end of the day , regardless of the prospect , I will make it in life . I'm not the type to only have such small dreams to work in a company , being behind a desk for my whole entire life . I believe that the amount of shit I've been through my whole life , although means absolutely nothing to me , could be a guide for someone else. I'm willing to bet that there are people who are fighting a fight way worse than mine and suffering in silence that I don't know about , and I want to help those people.

I don't hate people in particular. I just hate this family . Family gatherings are the worst , as there's literally nothing to talk about , and no one to talk to. Considering that I now have a valid driving license  and keys to a car , I can escape all the harshness of this pathetic system where it's almost compulsory to attend all these lame events . I'm not close to my cousins , and they're mostly all overseas , and everyone else is just plain too old for me to even try to start a conversation with. In the end , the only thing I hear uttered from their mouths would be " I love your hair Greg , is it natural or did you perm it ? " It's natural , it's always been natural . Please get it into your brain and stop asking me the same thing every bloody time we meet up.

At the end of the day , I'm just a teenager with a few billion issues , and it could either haunt me or haunt the people around me. I'd rather explode by myself , than even considering that someone would even bother to understand me. I've tried , didn't go too well. Great job family , you fucked up.

People like returning home , because it's a fun place and you're really familiar and fond of its surroundings. You might have a pet dog greet you when you enter the house , or your cat that just doesn't care. Or that fish tank that you're required fill up with fish food in a few minutes. 

Then there's your siblings ( if you have any ) , your mum and dad , and possibly your aunt , uncles and grandparents. Most people would love to see them and have them around , then there's me. I don't despise them or anything , but I'm not fond of them. What is my problem ? Let me explain.

There are a few types of people that I absolutely despise . There's the egomaniacs , the narcissists , the homophobic , and the totally religious one. I'll start in the order above.

Egomaniacs , there are a lot of them in this world , and in my family . Who are they , I won't mention. Typical egomaniacs would have tons of things to boast about , and are always showing themselves off based on the amount of "knowledge" that they claim to have , or they would show off someone else. These people couldn't care less about other people , as their own opinion or their significant others' seem to be more important than other people. And they're not even anyone special or anything. For once , could you shut up about all your stuff , as no one even cares ? You're boring , and no one even likes to talk to you in family gatherings as well . Or do you need a car to hit you so you get some sense knocked into you ? Shut up .

The narcissists , pretty much the exact same thing as the egomaniacs so I won't stress this one out further.

The homophobic ones , there are a lot of them in my family. Call me crazy , insane , " I require medical attention " , but I'm a very open minded person. I'm not the type of person who sees life as : 

Study hard -> Get a good job -> Get lots of money -> Die

Do you even see the logic in there ? Like , what kind of legacy would you even leave behind ? You just want to be a regular human working a day job every single day for a few decades ? That's extremely sad . 

I have big plans for myself , and probably doing something good for the human race - although currently I'm here , writing this blog post , and complaining about life and contemplating the existence of humanity , as per usual.

But back to the main topic , I believe in love . And it's not just a general thing , where a guy loves a girl , or an animal loves another animal , or a human loves a thing . Some people are born a differently. They're handicapped , or "special". They deserve love . They deserve going to prom and having a family with kids , just as much as normal people do. LGBT ( lesbian , gay , bisexual , transgender ) people also deserve the same amount of rights . But of course , the Queen of England is too retarded and too Christian like to see it that way , and pretty much for my mum and dad .

I'm not stating that I'm gay , or bi - but everyone deserves a chance. "In the Bible , God said...." well to Hell with that . If you're that small minded and insanely dumb , don't bother talking to me , not even for a bit.

Which brings me to the last pointer , the extremist of religious people. Of course , I'm not pointing everything to Christians , as other religions have followers that can be a little extreme , in a more serious manner . *cough* Islam *cough* . 

Having a religion isn't a necessity in life . In fact , there are so many religions in this world that it's so hard to choose. At the end of the day you could just end up worshiping Michael Jackson for all I care . "MJism" . For my mum , being a Christian means that we're all not allowed to have any sort of fun in this world. Like , all we're meant to do is to pray 24/7 to God. I'd rather just end my life and meet Him and face my judgment - which let's be realistic , it's not going to end well for me. 

Oh look a scary novel ; demonic. Oh look , hip hop music ; demonic. Oh look a horror movie ; demonic. Oh wow Power Rangers monsters which are basically human beings dressed up in costumes ; demonic. If this is how life is supposed to be in my mums perspective , then I'd rather be the disobedient son that I already am and live life with my sanity , and possibly my title as a human being intact.

Do you really think that the Earth and Earthlings is pure ? Everyone has made mistakes , and it would be an amazing move if aliens were to colonize this awful planet , and wiping out 7 billion people in the process. The world needs another Genesis incident , which is basically the Flood , Noah's Ark and all that stuff - which is the only thing that really interests me when I read the Bible because , a lot of people died. 

But these are the characteristics of some of my family members. But family gatherings in general - it's just plain boring. The only thing I ever hear from my family members would be : is your hair natural ? Let me explain .

My hair is seriously curly , and a LOT of people envy it in my family. I'm not sure why , but it seems cool to them so I'll just roll along with it. But that's really all I hear from my family members , as they're all consisting of the elderly. My cousins , they don't really socialize with me to begin with because I can't really click with them , and I don't intend on starting. In which concludes to me being on my phone for the whole time , waiting for the dreadful night to end.

It's always been like that , and it just will stay that way. Most of my cousins are overseas anyways so I'm literally the walking dead whenever I go for these lame family gatherings. I don't care whose birthday it is , it's gonna be boring . 

The good news is that I have a car and a legitimate driving license , so I can just bail and enjoy dinner with - myself as I'm a lonely person and no one really loves me. Yay !!

Taken from : http://www.jameskingston.co.uk

It took me at least 4 days to just write this blog post. There was a lot of drafting , very little thinking , a lot of contemplating , tons of time wasting , no planning , and why are you still reading this ? Kidding . Bear with me here for a tad bit.

So I'm currently on my semester break , and the next semester begins in a week. Am I excited ? No I'm not. That's the beginning of my "bad news" section. Then there's the good news section , which I'll talk about first. 

So during my time off college , otherwise known as hell - I've just lazed around , relaxed and pretty much did absolutely nothing. I'm pretty sure that I've just been sitting in one spot for the whole time , which is where my laptop(s) , TV , and my charging plugs are. Heck , I'm so engrossed to technology that I basically just fall asleep in front of my laptop screen for most of the nights. Addiction ? Totally . Doing anything productive ? Maybe that one time where I searched up the cure to migraines. 

There is no cure to migraines , just keep up with your medication intake .

The good news would have to be next week . The first thing would be that I'll be heading off to Penang , which is a state a little far away from where I currently am , without my parents or any guardian whatsoever. I am going with my friends , and hopefully they don't get me killed as I'll be traveling with them during that time. I get to visit my grandma too , which I haven't seen in four years so that should be fun.

The whole purpose of the trip is because a bunch of friends from college wants to attend a concert , performed by Japanese artists which apparently are "very popular" , but I don't really care so I'm not going to be joining them. After all, Japan is weird , the people are weirder , and their music doesn't interest me - and I am an avid music fan of all genres . Although , there are two Japanese songs that I really like , linked directly below :

The second good news would be for myself , and perhaps for any Ariana Grande fans that are reading this. Her album , Dangerous Woman comes out in 10 days , and the songs that she has revealed so far are really impressive , so I'm totally psyched for the album .

I also got myself Overwatch , which is a video game that has been hyped for since last year , and the game lived up to the hype. Blizzard never disappoints .

Now for the bad news. It all revolves around one lecturer , and her pathetic jealous vendetta on me. I don't know what I did to tick her off , but she's always getting on my nerves. Maybe she hates me , or maybe she hates guys , or maybe I'm just overreacting , but in conclusion - I hate you , you hate me. Done.

She failed me. And by that I mean two of the subjects I enrolled into this semester. Yes , two subjects out of the five that I took . That's absolutely absurd . Plagiarism is a bad thing in college. You copy a few sentences off a website for an assignment and you practically get a zero for it , even though you did your referencing at the end of the thesis. So for instance , you're expected to look up the history of Google , but you cannot copy the facts on the web page , even with full referencing at the end of it - because you would fail the paper.

It's almost like taking an open-book examination but you cannot use the textbooks for reference. It's bullshit. Oh yeah hey , all this is referenced via my own personal opinion(s) on you , so sue me for plagiarism . I think you're a narcissist. The worst kind of them as a matter of fact. Your jokes are shit , you're only funny about 20% of the time , and everything else about you is just ridiculous. 

You spread "rumors" about my friends , and only claims to have heard it from "somewhere" , "sometime" , "someone" , "somehow" . Because - coincidentally someone was talking bad about my friends . And you have the audacity to mention that it's from someone else . Heck , even from the dean of the faculty ? Insane ! There are so many students taking this course , so why only blacklist 3 individuals ? A personal vendetta , that's my conclusion. Deranged psychopath , mostly me for my insane amount of grudge towards your sorry ass.

I didn't attend college to make friends , but that situation is inevitable. I can't connect with everyone , so you could befriend one person every day , but you'd make two enemies each day in return. Maybe the three of us are being targeted because we have a weakness , being incomplete in a certain aspect , or because we seem vulnerable to bullying. Well , we're not. You mess with one of us , you mess with all three of us. We ain't taking shit today , tomorrow , or even in the future , so give it your best shot.

This is the tenth Blog update in the ten-week assignment for college. So right after this post , there might not be new updates for a brief period of time. I'm putting my Blog life to the side for the moment while I focus on passing my college semester, Either way , enjoy the final post in the ten-week assignment

Growing up happens to everyone and everything , whether you like it or not. When you're young , you were dreaming about the day you'd be fully grown into a teenager , then to an adult. I'm pretty sure that you were really happy when you reached your tenth birthday. Don't lie , you were very happy to be double digits in age.

But now , you just want to become a child again.

You don't realize it when you're little , but you have the whole world to yourself. There really isn't many things opposing you , except for the conceptual fact that time doesn't slow down for anyone . These days , the 24-hour clock doesn't seem so 24-hour(ish) . Time can fly really fast , and that means that a day has passed. And another day passes by. Then another. Somehow , a whole year has passed by and you're one year older.

As you grow up , you face tons of things that could drag you down to the point of depression , anxiety and the feeling of giving up on everything and hoping that time could just be paused. The main thing about growing up would be to hit puberty , and that's when things start to change. If you're a guy , your voice cracks , your growth becomes rapid , you start growing hair everywhere and you'll have an interest in girls as your hormones starts raging. About this time you'd also find out that porn is a thing and that basically ruins your teenage life , in a way.

If you're a girl , you'd experience the very first period - which is not fun , I'm pretty sure of it. Besides that , you'd have your breasts growing with your hormones and stuff , and you'll start to like guys. This is also the part when girls actually become very dirty minded and start doing really dumb stuff that guys find super seductive and attractive. I don't think I need to explain further on this.

You'd have your first kiss , your first crush , your first date , your first boyfriend / girlfriend - basically your first of everything. It might seem fun and all but it gets very stressful , as you'd be very confused about what's going on and you're purely acting based on instinct alone. There really isn't much decision making to be done , so mistakes can happen - and that would lead to downfalls.

The dark side of being in your teenage years would be depression. Somehow , sometime , you'd face depression. The thoughts of being alone , being completely isolated and the fear of being left out starts to haunt you , and it's traumatizing. If you just broke up with your significant other , things can be a little worse. As for me , I required a lot of counseling when I was in my early and mid teenage years in order to keep myself intact and to think straight.

I was a very shy person - and I still am. I find it personally hard to approach someone to start a conversation , especially if it's a girl that I'm approaching because , I guess girls have very high expectations for a random guy to go up to them and start a normal conversation with. But I guess I still live with a high level of anxiety and insecurities.

I also figured out that there's more to life than just spending money to get a proper education in order to get a good job and have a smooth life. Earth is a miraculous creation created by The Almighty in The Beginning. I wanted , and still want to explore everything that mother nature has to offer . However , you need money to travel - so getting a job is inevitable at the end of the day.

But things have to go one step at a time , because with growth comes wisdom. I learn new things everyday and I meet new people , and I couldn't be more grateful for everything that I have granted to me right now. Growing up is basically all about gratitude , that you've been given a chance to grow up and life the one life given to you. Be grateful , and appreciate everything in life.

Have a great day , until I Blog again 

I made this Blog to talk about life . Whether it's my life or someone else's or something that everyone can relate to about life , that was the whole reason this Blog started in the first place. Heck , that was the reason why I started blogging in the first place. It's why everything started .....

"In the beginning" ..... no , I won't start this Blog post that way. Things aren't always easy , that's the beginning. Life is like a spiral of emotions , feelings , tragedies and disasters. "Happy birthday" - you've survived yet another year. Prepare for the next year , that basically repeats itself with all the issues that everyone and everything has in store for you.

You can cartwheel all you want past life , but sometimes you stray onto a path where there's a huge boulder in front of you , and you're expected to climb it . Not cartwheel over it , going around it , or even turning back. You have to climb it. 

Everything that happens in life can be traced back to a single small decision made in the past , either by yourself or by someone else. It changes the course of time , and therefore it alters the future , which is now your past. Those decisions change things , in a huge way. It effects the way you grow up , the type of mentality that you will have , and the way you present yourself . 

Behind a happy face , is a sorrowful soul. Problems occur everywhere , and on everyone. You might seem happy , and even appear happy - but are you happy ? I know people who are cheerful all the time , and puts smiles on everyone's faces. But when they're all alone with me , they share their darkest secrets , their inner selves are shown , and they're not happy. We all go through problems. Problems with family , friends , work , and a lot more.

We're all merely a particle in the Universe , and the Universe couldn't be bothered. Things are meant to happen , all because of a small decision. Adam and Eve ate an apple in the Beginning , and there came Sin , and that was the Darkness. Ever since then , life wasn't so smooth anymore. 

For my case , my "dad" deciding to leave me in the clutches of my "mother" and the abyss of damnation , he basically screwed me over. What was once an innocent boy living in the world has now become an Antichrist psychopathic maniac that requires killing stuff , or watching people die for his soul to be satisfied. You might think that's crazy , but I've watched all the SAW and Final Destination movies and I enjoy watching the characters die one after another in a tragic way. It keeps my sanity intact. 

I need to see a therapist ? I did. I had a lot of counseling and that didn't really work out.